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The post Where you’ll find me these days appeared first on Part-Time Traveler.

9.3.21

As we embrace the start of 2022, I wanted to share the happiest day of 2021 (and many years to come, I’m sure!) here with you all.

On September 3, 2021, against the pandemic odds, I got married! I wondered whether to share this personal day in any public way, but I remember how many seeing other weddings online helped me understand what I wanted (and helped me make it through some of the most stressful months of planning.)

Our original, pre-pandemic plan was to host a destination wedding in Sicily, a place that both of us love, part of my new husband’s heritage, and one full of memories from one of our very favorite trips together. We began researching and reaching out to vendors in February 2020, so you can imagine with that timing…that plan didn’t stick for very long. As soon as lockdown happened, followed by COVID spikes in Italy, we accepted that we would need to reroute. (Still, if you are in a position where visiting or getting married in Sicily is feasible, do check out the Tonnara di Scopello — as this would likely have been our venue.)

The next step was to think about why we had initially chosen Sicily. Part of the draw to getting married abroad, other than both of our love for travel, was the opportunity to share a place we love with our guests. We also wanted to focus on sharing an experience rather than putting on an elaborate event. It also didn’t hurt that all wedding-related costs were significantly lower in Sicily.

The nature of a destination wedding also means a smaller group size and accepting that not everyone you would like to be there can indeed attend. It turns out that this mindset helped us pivot into a pandemic-safe wedding size, first dictated by COVID restrictions and then by the size of the venues we chose.

We ended up only being able to accommodate 40 guests, but we made this easier by limiting our guest list to immediate family and bridal party, with the addition of a few local friends who are close to both of us. And of course, what place do we love more than San Francisco?

The Venue

We decided to get married in the city we live in and love so much, our home. Being that neither of us identifies as religious, we loved the idea of getting married in a civic place. San Francisco City Hall is also the site of some of the first gay marriages in California and was a leader in officiating same-sex marriage in this country. We loved the idea of honoring marriage equality and the significance of the site.

Of course, it doesn’t hurt that San Francisco City Hall is one of the most beautiful buildings I’ve ever seen. We didn’t get to tour the interior before we chose it as our venue, but one look at some wedding photos shot there sold me. I was so relieved that we had found a place for our big day that was both meaningful and beautiful to both of us.

Our pandemic pivot was stressful, but in the end we couldn’t have chosen a wedding location that was more “us.”

Getting Ready

I got ready at The Metropolitan Club downtown surrounded by my bridal party. Initially, I wasn’t sure that I wanted bridesmaids, particularly as we were having such a small wedding, but after thinking about it I decided I wanted to honor my closest friends in this way. And when else would I have such an opportunity?

Each bridesmaid chose their own dress in a pale pink color, and I was amazed at how coordinated everyone looked despite not having the same exact dress. My bridesman coordinated his shirt and tie and it meant so much to me to be surrounded by their love and friendship (on average we were looking at 18+ years of being friends!) I got everyone matching pajamas (theirs in pale pink, mine in white) custom-made via Etsy, which added to the morning fun.

After months of decision-making — from the dress and veil to the shoes to the custom rings — it was amazing to see everything come together the morning of.

We drank champagne, noshed on breakfast burritos and fresh fruit together, and took turns getting our hair done. I actually did not know with certainty how my hair would be done the day of, despite having two hair trials, which added some stress. In the end, I was happy with how my curls came out and decided to wear my hair down. I did my own makeup, which was not only more predictable but also relaxing for me!

The Ceremony

SF City Hall has three options for getting married: public, private for 1 hour, or a full buyout. The 1-hour private ceremony was a perfect happy medium for us and our 40 guests.

There are also a couple of location options for private ceremonies. We went with the Fourth Floor Gallery due to the natural light present there.

The ceremony went by so quickly for me! My bridesman Zach played the violin as I walked down the aisle with my dad. We read our own vows, and my aunt officiated. While at times I wished we could have accommodated more guests, I am so, so happy we kept our group size to 40. It felt incredible to feel the most significant people in our lives surrounding us with support. We were also both so in the moment, I don’t know if my brain could’ve taken in any more faces!

Many tears were shed, and then many pictures were taken. Some of my favorite shots are the candids we took as we exited City Hall, and because we had such a small group present we were able to capture some wonderful moments of all our wedding guests together with us.

Then it was time to head over the Golden Gate Bridge, where our reception location awaited!

Dinner and the Reception

When it came to where we would celebrate upon departing City Hall, we considered a range of options. We still had our intention of creating a bit of an experience, even an escape, for our wedding guests, with a sense of place — perhaps by the water. So we looked at having a reception down in Carmel/Big Sur or up in Mendocino. It seemed that perhaps renting out part of a restaurant nearby to City Hall was a better plan until we found…

China Cabin is the former formal social salon of the 19th-century ship P.S. China, one of two ships that used to take mail to and from North America to Asia. When the ship was decommissioned, the local historical society fought to save this part of the ship, decorated in 22-karat gold and dripping with elegance.

They restored it as a Victorian drawing room, which felt in line with the time and history of San Francisco. I’m not kidding when I say that I gasped when I first walked inside. It now sits on the waterfront in Belvedere/Tiburon. Surrounded by hills and with calm waters in the marina below, it has an incredible view of the San Francisco skyline as well, which felt really special.

The space is today lovingly run by the historical society and with the help of volunteers. We loved the idea of contributing to a local nonprofit and celebrating in a historic setting, and this spot checked both those boxes. It also had both outdoor and indoor space (with great ventilation,) which made us feel safer about our fully vaccinated gathering and took away much of the worry that our guests could get the virus. In fact, the weather turned out to be so nice on the day that we spent all of our time outside except for eating dinner (and some of the dancing.)

We kicked things off with a cocktail hour that was longer than an hour. We served favorite wines from France, Spain, Italy, and California, as well as signature cocktails that were each our order on our first date. It was really fun for the two of us to share that with our guests and also, so full circle to cheers on our wedding day with the same drinks we shared the evening we met.

In the spirit of our intended wedding location, we were lucky enough to find caterers who provided the most wonderful Sicilian food. And what amazing food it was! I highly recommend our caterer. The arancini (well, all the cocktail hour apps) and handmade pasta dishes were especially memorable.

There were several other travel and language touches that suited us both as a couple. From a guest book made of vintage postcards (worldwide destinations for me, national parks for him) placed into an old suitcase, to beverages chosen to represent some of our favorite countries, to favors that were a selection of loose-leaf teas sourced from our favorite places (we made our own and chose Japanese, English, and Indian teas!)

I also compiled various favorite poems from both of us and our wedding party and presented those as a ‘pick a poem’ (in a ceramic bowl handmade by my brother) to set the tone as guests arrived.

Of course, my truly only request was to have a champagne tower. I love the celebratory nature of it, and the experience of pouring it together lived up to my hopes and dreams!

Our stunning cake, made by a woman-owned small business, was another highlight. We ordered enough for 60-70 for our 40-person wedding and hardly ended up with leftovers because our guests enjoyed it that much. One friend later confessed to eating four slices (ha.) We opted for vanilla buttercream cake with salted caramel, topped with buttercream peonies. It was also so incredibly beautiful, I couldn’t recommend her cakes more.

We curated our own playlists — one for cocktail hour, one for dinner, and one for dancing — and played them on a large speaker rather than hire a DJ for our small group. We also opted to hire a day-of planner. This is something I was sure we didn’t need, and initially seemed out of our budget, but ended up being a great decision. Turns out even if your wedding is small there are still just as many decisions and often nearly as much to manage. Having a professional (we found her on Thumbtack) run the show made it so that we could relax on the day and also not have to ask anything of our friends or family. We wanted everyone to simply be present and soak in the day, and this helped so much with that. She also helped coordinate our first dance and the father-daughter dance, which was needed since we didn’t have a DJ.

Dinner was calm and gave us a chance to catch our breath. My new husband and I made the rounds and spoke with each of our guests. It still took us quite a bit of time to speak with everyone, but it was wonderful being able to do so.

We rounded out the evening with speeches (unexpectedly many of my favorite moments, I wish I had them on video!) and of course, more dancing. We ended the evening with a small after-party down the road at Sam’s in Tiburon surrounded by our closest friends.

Dealing with the pandemic on every level — from dress shopping to the guest list to the safety on the day of — was not easy. Still, in the end, despite the stressful parts of planning and having to shift our plans multiple times, it was all worth it. I said this to myself throughout the wedding process, but it’s also true in life — that every time my plans are thrown off, I eventually get to where I am meant to be. This was much more difficult to remember in 2020 and 2021, but it turned out to be true. And even if it hadn’t, I came to terms with trusting that being married to my partner was what mattered anyway.

At times we felt like we were in our own little world, and in other moments, like we were surrounded by the people who have had the greatest impact on our individual lives and the life we share together. As someone skeptical about the whole wedding industry, bringing those people together to celebrate an occasion that is so, so happy made having a wedding worth it. The whole day held a feeling I never want to forget.

I can’t help but smile when I realize how it all came together in the end. We both love Europe (and hope to live there someday!) and my husband’s favorite country is Italy, and mine is France. In the end, friends and family noted how much City Hall’s architecture reminded them of France and how much the setting in Belvedere reminded them of Italy.

So, without intending to, we ended up evoking two of the places we love and had hoped to celebrate our marriage in, all while staying close to home and staying safe in the pandemic.

Next up, I’ll be sharing about our honeymoon (and my one international trip in the past two years…) in Greece!

Vendors:

Dress: Novella Bridal – 565 Sutter Street, San Francisco

Photography: Amanda Wei Photography

Rings: La Bijouterie – 388 Market Street #10, San Francisco

Cake: From Flour

Catering: S&S Gastro

Florist: Elizabeth Mauricio

Rentals: Bright Event Rentals

Music: our own playlists – cocktail hour / dinner / dancing

The post Our Wedding appeared first on Part-Time Traveler.

I have always been able to identify a theme, a lens through which to recap and share about the past year. Some years it’s been through photos, others through meals, some even through hotel stays or focusing on growth during a tough time.

I know it’s a word that gets thrown around a lot, but the unifying thought that comes to mind as I look back genuinely at 2018 is:

Gratitude.

To the trips I took this year…I’m grateful. For the first time in many years, there were more personal trips than professional (and there were several reasons for that.) These trips, as with all things in life, had their ups and downs. Yet I still sit here in wonder, recognizing that this life of travel and living in San Francisco was once a flicker of a dream that I didn’t really think I could ever have, let alone sustain (and, here I still am!)

The less dreamy part: balancing work, travel, personal relationships, and health continues to be a challenge, but it’s one I always welcome and I hope to continue to be honest about with you here.

To the many successes and challenges of life at home in 2018 (which I go into greater depth about below,)…I’m grateful. Truly.

But first, travels of a part-time traveler — and what I learned.

:: travel  ::

Sri Lanka + Kerala, India

I rang in the new year in the mountains of Ella, Sri Lanka with a long hike, a pot of Ceylon tea, and some pretty terrible champagne. (Worth it.) My friend and I were in the midst of exploring this newly reawakened destination, having tacked on the country to our original plans to revisit India.

After a few weeks in the country, we then headed to Kerala — a place I’d been hoping to visit ever since my first trip to India years ago and the cornerstone of our trip.

Here’s what I loved about both places:

Sri Lanka

What a diverse destination! There is such a variety of cool things to do and see in such a small area. I haven’t seen such a wealth of different experiences concentrated in one place since I visited New Zealand.

From crowded cities and epic scenery and train journeys to massive mountains, sunrise safaris, and chilled-out beach hangs…From curated coffee shops to roadside coconut stalls, there’s something for everyone here. And although I can’t say I fell for it as hard as I have neighboring India — I found it a bit harder to connect in a meaningful way with the people and culture there — I really appreciated my time in Sri Lanka and would love to return.

Read: A Photo Tour of Sri Lanka

Kerala, India

I had my ‘India guard’ up when I left Sri Lanka. And I don’t just meant that I was covered head-to-toe in local garb; I had my tough exterior out, ready to elbow out anyone who tried to get too close, my bargaining skills sharpened, and my pace quickened. I was prepared to survive and thrive in my favorite country.

Very quickly, I learned that that kind of demeanor would simply not suit Kerala.

I would need to relax, to slow down, to maybe even get an Ayurvedic massage (or two or three) in order to understand this vastly different region of India, which in many ways almost felt like a different country.

I really could divide my time in Kerala in two. The first half of my travels there were about seeing the major sights of the state. I traveled with my friend from the cities to the mountains to the backwaters, on which a multi-day houseboat trip quickly became one of my favorite journeys, ever.

For the second half I traveled solo, where I:

• Got lost and missed my train stop, resulting in a complete panic about being the only woman on a train at night (the very thing I had been trying to avoid,) followed by the help and assistance of one of the kindest men I’ve ever met traveling. This series of events resulted in a travel essay (which is to be published) and a viral tweet about the experience. So suffice to say, I had something to say after that adventure.
• Spent a week on the very relaxed shores of Varkala, a hippie beach town where I stayed in an awesome house and made some wonderful friends (who then visited me later in the year in San Francisco!) If you’re looking for the most chilled-out version of India that I’ve heard of, this is your place.
• Tried on life in an Indian ashram, the prospect of which fully terrified me and subsequently, changed my life (the two seem to go hand-in-hand, don’t they?)

Read: The Prettiest Place in India You Probably Haven’t Heard Of

What I Learned Living in an Ashram in India

Tokyo

Japan was the top of my list for 2018 travel. It was a country I’d been yearning to visit since I was a small child, one that I had avoided for way too long, and this was the year that was going to change.

Well, folks…be careful what you wish for. It wasn’t even one full month into the year that I found myself in Tokyo..completely by mistake.

I welcomed my first time in Japan with open arms…and about five hours of sleep in three days (psssh…flight delays.) Still I was determined to make the most of my stay (and my travel insurance,) so I toured the main sights, including the now-moved Tsukiji fish market. I dined solo at one of the top sushi spots in the world (YOLO, and P.S. being a single diner at one of those places is the best way to avoid the long waits,) and generally forgot/ignored how exhausted I was as I pranced throughout what quickly became one of my favorite cities on the planet.

Thank goodness for that cashmere scarf I bought randomly in the Indian hippie beach town…because otherwise I would’ve had not one piece of appropriate clothing to shield me from snow in Tokyo on my unexpected layover. Also FYI, they sell amazing and cheap ceramics at the Tsukiji outer market, and green tea Kit Kats in mass quantities should be kept away from me at all costs.

Read: Well, the Japan posts are coming soon (I hear your requests for an itinerary!) For now, find some of my favorite spots as shared on my Instagram.

Nashville + Memphis, Tennessee

I had the chance to explore Memphis as I returned for the third year as a Bloghouse mentor and speaker on writing and social media. The highlights for me, outside of barbecue and fried chicken (because that goes without saying,) were the live music I stumbled upon (hello Blues,)  the National Civil Rights Museum (moving beyond belief,) and the true delight that is connecting with good people. I haven’t been doing as great job of attending workshops and conferences in my industry as I was when I began (but I am teaching at them!) This reminded me why it’s important: I am fortunate enough to still call some of the people I met at my very first conference (Bloghouse) some of my closest friends to this day.

I then journeyed to Nashville for my second time in Music City. I got to know the city a little better, seeking out some neighborhoods I hadn’t visited (shoutout to East Nashville!) explored with a friend from SF who came to meet me there, and of course, delighted in a Nashville Eats food and walking tour to dive a little deeper into the local food scene.

Although I’ll never leave California without kicking and screaming (you can quote me on that…) I find Tennessee to be one of my favorite states to visit and I always leave wishing I had more time there.

Read: Where to Eat in Nashville: A Weekend Guide

A Weekend in Memphis

Japan

What is Japan if not a dream trip come true?

I returned to Japan (this time on purpose lol) for parts of August and September. For years I had put off planning a trip there, mostly because I misjudged the cost of going. It’s true that Japan is more expensive than many other destinations in Asia, but at the current moment (especially coming from SF,) it seemed no more expensive and often cheaper than being home — especially when it came to the cost of good meals (majority of my budget, let’s be honest.)

I went with my forever travel partner-in-crime, and she’s half Japanese American so we had the added bonus of meeting some of her family (including an uncle who is a sake sommelier, what what!) during our three week stay. After getting a Japan Rail Pass (three weeks is by far the best deal, if you can swing it!) we planned a just-packed-enough itinerary that took us all over the country.

From neon nights and sushi stalls of Japan’s biggest cities to remote art islands, a labyrinth of alleyways in Kyoto, and staying in a monastery on a sacred mountain…we experienced a lot of what the country has to offer. Yet…I feel like I hardly scratched the surface and I already can’t wait to get back.

Japan made its way into my heart (and also my top five countries list) quite quickly. My lesson from that is: if you feel drawn to a place, if you keep going back to one country or one experience whenever you daydream about traveling…go there already.

(Posts forthcoming.)

Hawaii

Somehow I made it to three Hawaiian islands on my way back to California from Japan.

But not without some travel drama. See, I found a flight from Osaka to Honolulu for a mere $120 (insane.) The plan was to stay with my friend’s family on Oahu and then Kauai before heading home to SF.

Ah, when life hands you a typhoon and decides to laugh at your plans.

After we discovered the runway we were supposed to fly from was completely submerged underwater, we were forced to seek an alternative route out. By the grace of having accidentally started our rail pass a day late, we were able to depart for Honolulu via Tokyo. I then unexpectedly (sensing a theme here?) also ended up on the Big Island, a place I grew up going to every year and was happy to return to for a few days.

My time in Hawaii consisted this time mostly of being shown around by locals and taken to all the best food. So you can expect Oahu, Big Island, and Kauai food-focused guides, as well as an update to my popular Kauai itinerary, soon.

Read: One Week in Kauai (updates forthcoming!)

London + Paris + Provence + Barcelona

In yet another twist of life and timing and travel, I landed home from Kauai with approximately eight hours to sleep and repack before heading back to the airport and flying off to Europe. Because when you start dating someone who loves London as much as you do, but has yet to see Paris OR Barcelona…you go.

I was admittedly a little nervous to travel in Paris with someone, especially a romantic partner. Paris has always been the city I go to alone. It’s the place that taught me how to love being on my own.

Turns out there is something to sharing a bottle of Bordeaux under the Eiffel Tower and holding hands as you walk along the Seine. Who knew!?

So I got to show my boyfriend two of my favorite cities in the world. And I was lucky enough to squeeze in some new parts of Provence — Avignon, the Luberon, and Cassis to name a few — along the way. Look for posts on each in the coming months!

New York City

We made a quick stop in NYC — a city that I continue to love to visit but could never live in (controversial opinion alert) — for a wedding on the way home from Europe. I got to hug some friends who live there, eat some classic NYC foods (hello, Prince Street Pizza and Levain Bakery cookies,) and then attend a traditional Chinese wedding (with alllll the dumplings) in Flushing!

As someone who has learned that two, maximum three, weeks on the road without time at home is when I really begin to fall out of the balance I work so hard to create, it was a challenge being gone for nearly two months. I wouldn’t trade any of those trips for anything, but the extended time away from home reinforced what I have always known about the need for part-time (as opposed to full-time!) travel.

Carmel

I’m SO excited that this week, after eight months of planning, my dear friend Jessica of Bon Traveler and I will be launching our debut retreat for emerging bloggers. The idea for Gather + Getaway was born over coffee in San Francisco, and we found a wonderful partner in Visit Carmel to have our very first gathering of creative women on the beautiful California coast we both love.

Expect to see more of Carmel and Big Sur as we showcase the area to our brilliant attendees!  If you’re a female creative and want to know more about our next retreat this year, do sign up for our mailing list to be the first to receive announcements and openings (our first retreat sold out!)

Read: Come Travel and Write With Me

Wine Country

I’ve been saying that I wanted to spend more time in Northern California wine country for ages, and this turned out the be the year I got to know the area a bit better. From Healdsburg with friends to winery work trips to covering Downtown Napa, it was lovely to see the wineries bouncing back from the terrible fires that have happened over the past few years.

Living in such a region with such an abundance of excellent food and wine is one of the primary reasons I love living where I do (and a compelling reason for you to visit the area!) Yes, they’re still making incredible wine up there and yes, it’s still very much worth every day trip or weekend you can manage.

I’m planning to share a lot more of my local knowledge about how to enjoy San Francisco, and its surrounding areas, in the coming year. You can expect to read a lot more here about how to experience my Bay Area backyard in 2019.

Read: Weekend Getaway: Downtown Napa

:: home/personal/work ::

I started the year finally feeling at peace with the patience and process required of dating and being single (thank you, yoga in India + ashram stay.) Of course, it was only then that I met and began a relationship with a truly incredible man that I’m thankful for every day.

I have learned so much from years of being and choosing to stay single —  about showing up, about surrendering and trusting in what is beyond my control, about letting go of outcomes. (But this reflection is for another time.)  It took many years of self-doubt (and too many bad dates) to now find myself falling asleep most nights with a little smile on my face, thanks to this person. It has made me trust the timing of life a little bit more.

I never take it for granted.

I watched some of my very best friends cope with heartbreaking hurdles such as loss, life-threatening illness, and addiction — and then bounce back, and begin to heal and strengthen. I was reminded more than ever that life can be heavy and it is, in a word, short. Things can change in an instant. Empathy for the human experience, and true friendship, is everything.

—

I saw my relationship with San Francisco continue to evolve. I got more frustrated than ever with the changes facing my city.

I can’t tell if it’s the city that’s changing, or me, or if it’s just the nature of no longer being bright-eyed and bushy-tailed about living here. It’s probably all three. Yet along with some conflicting feelings about it, I also feel a deeper love for the city than ever before. I’m not going anywhere.

I’m also exploring the ways in which we can thrive by identifying the place that’s truly right for us — whether that’s living or visiting there — and I’m also exploring writing a book about it (!) What are your thoughts?

—

I felt the travel writing and media industries shift enormously, and at times I felt saddened by the changes and if I’m being honest, a bit left behind. In truth, I did not meet many of my ‘on paper’ professional goals for the year. I did more thinking and planning, laying foundation, and shifting this year than the super-driven side of me would have liked.

Still, so much to celebrate: I launched a business I’m truly passionate about with a partner/colleague I respect, I redesigned/updated my blog (hi there,) and I supported myself fully and successfully as a freelance writer for a fifth consecutive year. (!!)

All this questioning I had about my self-designed career did lead me to some a-ha moments about where I want to go next (and no, I don’t mean travel destinations!) I tested out opting for long-term investment in my own pursuits, instead of always choosing tasks for others to meet short-term income goals (and I plan to do a hell of a lot more of this in 2019. Eek!)

Although admittedly a bit scary to do so, I’m already starting to see the benefits. Going into the new year I’m feeling more motivated and confident in my direction than ever, enough to take some risks and place some bets on myself in ways I haven’t before. Much of that you’ll see reflected here on the blog, and I truly thank you for being part of this journey with me.

Also I think it’s important to reflect not just on how society deems our years worthy and goals met, but how we ourselves do. For me, this means waking up happy most mornings, having great people to love in my life, and feeling balanced and aligned (and not too stressed or overwhelmed.)

In that regard, this was one of my most successful years to date.

Even more gratitude…for:

Love and tacos. My 2018 aspirations. Once again be careful what you wish for!

My meditation habit and yoga practice. My loved ones’ health and well-being.

Working through perfectionism and impostor syndrome in my work. And…

Stretching myself to be comfortable with a little more risk in my business.

Learning to say ‘no’ more often. “Say no to what doesn’t serve you well so you can say yes to what does.”

Trusting in the flow of life. It’s not always easy, but it hasn’t steered me wrong yet.

—

As for next year? I’m looking forward to a road trip around Sicily and showing Rome to my favorite person. I’ve got my eye on Oaxaca and Mexico City, some U.S. national parks, and maybe even a return trip to Japan.

That’s just the travel part. The rest? I guess we’ll all just have to wait and see.

Wishing you a year to be grateful for in 2019.

<< Past annual recaps: 2012, 2013, 2014: part 1, part 2, 2015, 2016 >>

The post A Year to Be Grateful For appeared first on Part-Time Traveler.

But I’ll let you in on a little secret: I’ve never been much of a poetry person. I love a Walt Whitman verse or a Neruda love line as much as the next person, but overall it hasn’t been my forte as a reader.

Slowly and surely, and perhaps coinciding with the rise of the Instagram poet or “Insta-poet,” whose words are absorbed through an iPhone screen, I found myself drawn to poetry in a very contemporary way. Themes of female empowerment, heartbreak, identity, and healing from trauma spoke directly to me.

I’ve also come to realize that the beauty of poetry, just as with all good writing, is packing a punch — using as few words as possible for maximum emotional effect. It’s not just about the meaning of the words. It’s the rhythm, the cadence, the musicality…the power.

Adding these feminist poets to my social media — particularly Instagram — has changed how I use the platform. Their words (and frankly, lack of staged imagery,) brought back some of the soul and the inspiration I had been missing there. The way I feel when I see something like this in my feed makes me feel influenced…in a positive way, for a change!

Here are five women whose powerful choice of words (and in most cases, also social media) has made them icons of modern poetry. I know many literary experts or poetry experts who would love to disagree — but their words are being read and felt by many and, if the poems convey meaning and connect us to the writer and to each other…is there more that needs to be qualified?

Each of their work continues to deeply impress upon me. I hope you get as much out of their stanzas and speech as I do.

1. Rupi Kaur

Is it even a list without mentioning this rockstar of a woman? Rupi Kaur rose to prominence with one controversial Instagram post, and has been topping the New York Times bestseller list since. Now she’s one of today’s most famous female poets.

When her most recent book of poetry, The Sun and Her Flowers, came out, I proceeded to sit in an armchair and devour it page-by-page, bookmarking corners and tearing up throughout.

Rupi has an almost otherworldly ability to express herself and connect with others through her work. Her poetry is especially resonant if you’re going through heartbreak (and who hasn’t.)

You can find her @rupikaur_ – though I recommend reading her books so that you can absorb her poems in sequence.

2. Nayyirah Waheed

Whereas Rupi’s poetry makes me feel like I know her and her story intimately, Nayyirah’s words tend to hit me personally. Her poems touch on universal themes of love, self-love, art, race, and more. They’re often reminders of simple truths we seem to easily forget — her words cut right to the point and right to your core. For this reason she’s one of my favorite follows on Twitter as well.

Find her @nayyirah.waheed.

things. that should be asked.
often.
in every type of.
relationship.
how is your heart.
is your breath happy. here.
do you feel free.

what about this theory. the fear of not being enough. and the fear of being ‘too much.’ are exactly the same fear. the fear of being you.

3. Alex Elle

At first glance on Instagram, Alexandra Elle looks to be a beautiful woman with a new baby and a darling family. She is that — but she also shares some of the most thought-provoking words I’ve come across there. An author and storyteller, she often shares close-ups of pieces of handwritten paper that are like little bolts of insight.

In a world where our attention spans seem to shrink by the second, isn’t it nice to feel something like gratitude or perspective in a flash instead of comparison or envy? You can really feel the positive intention behind Alex’s work. She continues to be one of my favorites to come across in my feed.

You can find her @alex_elle.

4. Lang Leav

Lang is an Australian poet born who was in a Thai refugee camp when her parents were fleeing the Khmer Rouge. Her life experience lends a heartbreaking relatability  to her words. She writes about love and loss in a way that will ring true and turn things on their head for many of us. She’s got several books of poetry, as well as an active social media presence.

She can be found @langleav.

5. Cleo Wade

I hadn’t heard of or seen Cleo Wade’s face until long after I had seen her words. You may recognize her handwriting — I must’ve seen it all across Pinterest. She’s known as an artist, activist, and poet, and she can often be found gracing the pages of your favorite fashion magazine. Regardless, her words often resonate beautifully — sometimes even when it’s as simple as a screenshot she posted of a text she sent to a friend. (Now, that’s relevant.)

She’s @cleowade.

Who else are you reading and/or following? Would love to hear your favorites!replica tag

The post The Modern Female Poets You Need To Be Following appeared first on Part-Time Traveler.

If travel can be made a priority in your life — dedicating your time, money, and resources to it instead of making other choices — the rewards will be far greater than just the frequent flier miles you acquire or bar stories you can tell. Along with your well-worn passport pages, you’ll gain invaluable experience that will teach you profound lessons about the world and about yourself.

Every person takes away different perspectives from even the same trip. Each destination is ever-evolving, we each bring a unique set of life experiences to it, and no two days in a place are the same. So while we associate certain things with specific places — you may have a spiritual experience when visiting India, or a culinary one when visiting France, for example — we can really never know what to expect to receive from our travels. Still, after decades of trips it’s hard not to look back and see some consistent themes emerge.

The ways in which traveling enriches our character are immeasurable. It is my hope that these side effects, the growth that happens alongside the joys and challenges of traveling, give you one more reason to get going and hit the road.

Here are some of the positive traits that we gain as we travel for personal development.

1. Learning to be happy with less.

Whether it’s learning through living with only what you can carry in your suitcase or backpack…or by seeing the happy lives of others who live with so much less than we do, seeing the world inevitably has this effect of feeling content with less. I think this is an especially dramatic shift for Americans. I speak for myself when I share that stepping out of an automatic/consumer way of thought in other countries allowed me to at least view what I own and how I purchase things from a different perspective.

This change is not a superior lens of detachment or rejection of buying things. It might be as simple as recognizing that you can be conscious of what is in your life and why. You may begin to place more value on resources that are easy to take for granted, such as clean drinking water, when you witness how they are not a given in every place on this Earth.

Travel doesn’t preach or require that you give up all your possessions and become some sort of nomad or monk. It does, however, grant a larger perspective — of life lived more simply (as it is, happily, in many places.) With this knowledge we can either become more grateful for what we do have…or see more clearly what may be weighing us down that we can shed to feel lighter.

2. Becoming wildly adaptable to change.

Bus canceled? Train too full? Your language unavailable? Exercising the flexibility muscle is a given when traveling, and it can happen before you even leave the country.

With the simple act of taking a plane somewhere, you will be subject to delays, rules, language barriers, cultural barriers, and more. You may have bought the right ticket (at the right price!) and you may show up to the gate on time, but ultimately unless you can fly a plane and control the weather your journey’s fate rests in factors outside of your control.

Within our comfort zones we often trick ourselves into thinking we have more control over things than we realistically do. Tricky transportation and navigating foreign lands grant us the opportunity to exercise thinking on our feet, problem-solving, and conflict resolution on a regular basis. And with that comes the ability to cope with a lot more than just shifting train times. Traveling trains you to better readjust and recover from factors outside your control (which, in this life, may be one of the only certainties in any journey.)

3. Learning to love being alone.

It still baffles me how many adult humans, both male and female and no matter how accomplished…cannot stand the thought of dining out alone. It shouldn’t surprise me; I used to be one of them.

Like a muscle that’s weak until we exercise it, we may not have the opportunity or real inclination to spend time in public on our own when at home. Even if your life isn’t full of social opportunities or inclinations, you may feel it is taboo or even depressing to see a movie, enjoy a meal, or show up to a party on your own.

Instead of waiting for the travel partner we’ll never have for all the trips we want to take, we have to embrace enjoying at least some of the experiences of the world on our own. It’s helpful to remember that there is a distinct difference between being alone and feeling lonely. It also helps to try this out in a country that values public alone time — for me it was France, and the role that Paris played in teaching me how to learn to love being alone will leave me forever indebted to the city.

Why learn to love traveling and being alone? You see sides of yourself that you can’t hide from, you learn to accept them, and eventually, you may even value your own company so much that you crave it. The confidence you gain in doing so stays with you from then on…no matter which country you stand in.

4. Knowing who you are. Loving who you are.

I’ve written a lot about how traveling strips us of the external factors that define our identity — roles, routines, labels, cultural mindsets, and much more — that have been integrated into who we are as a result of where and how we were raised in this world.

It’s not about abandoning these valuable parts of yourself, nor unlearning pieces of your personality that make you who you are. It’s about trying on other ways of living, even if for just a few weeks, and being more selective about your beliefs and behaviors as a result.

Traveling to me is like painting a canvas. When you step out of the frame you were given, not only does the size of your canvas grow but the colors from which you can choose to paint it with. You may not feel like the picture you are painting now fits you, or fully expresses who you are or what you want to be. Pick up that paintbrush by walking along an unfamiliar street, trying a new food, or learning a new phrase to speak with. Exposure to more experiences and ideas will only help you refine who you are at your core versus who you are as a product of your environment.

5. Growing your ability to empathize with others.

We are all, undeniably, partial products of the environment in which we live. Yet the truth is that we as people share 99.9% of the same DNA — just by being human.

The unfamiliarity and discomfort we feel in foreign places naturally shifts us from looking merely at the differences between us all and more closely into the commonalities. At the end of each day, we all seek the same basic needs. We all want to be loved. We all want to be fed, clothed, and housed. We all want our lives to have meaning and dignity. Sadly, sometimes where we come from and what we hear can clash with or cloud this simple truth.

I can’t tell you how many times travel has reinforced this for me. When you’re forced to find facial expressions or hand gestures to even order a morning cup of coffee, you find something that extends beyond the formalities we rely on at home. Finding this grants a sense of shared humanity, that you can then more easily identify not only in others but in yourself. It’s a constant exercise in seeing past the surface, a practice that deeply changes how you connect with others in this wide world we share.

What else has seeing the world taught you about yourself or about others? Do you travel for personal development and growth? I’d love to hear about it.

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The post Five Positive Traits Travel Helps You Build appeared first on Part-Time Traveler.

Sometimes a week away from home is all you need to realize how much you appreciate home.

And in my case, even when staying in a beautiful, comfortable house and without leaving San Francisco, this is still true.

If you watch my Instagram Stories (shameless plug,) by now you know I spend a lot of time in my second SF home (and watching a certain puppy dog, who I’m so attached to I have started calling her mine — much to the confusion of my friends.) I spent a week and a half there recently, bathed in sunlight and basking in the glory of their view of the city and the bay. Still, there is no place like home (even when you’ve been in a house so beautiful that coming home seems like a bit of a life downgrade!)

Still, there is no place like home (even when you’ve been in a house so beautiful that coming home seems like a bit of a life downgrade!)

Why is that? What is it about our own space and our own things that is so significant to our well-being? As I sat in my space after some time away, I took the time to look around at the small things that add meaning and a sense of peace and belonging in my little apartment bedroom.

Here is a peek into mine:

Without realizing it, I’ve built a space that feels so much like my little sanctuary — a positive, dare I say sacred space, filled with good energy and a calming sense of peace — so much so that I hardly want to spend time in the other rooms of my apartment.

We have all felt how our outer world can both impact and reflect our inner world. Travelers know this best of all. We all need a designated place to retreat, an oasis of calm where the pressures of the world melt away. To step into my room is to transform my mood in a way that’s better than an instant ‘sigh.’ Here’s what I’ve found contributes most to that feeling:

1. Essential Oil Diffuser

This is the one item that has (surprisingly) made the biggest difference in how I feel about my space. From eucalyptus to ylang-ylang to lemongrass and all the pretty essences in between, it’s a trick I actually picked up from staying in luxury hotels. Now I wonder why it took me so long to get one!

If it also seems silly to you at first, I suggest you try it before you make up your mind. It is amazing how much scent can subtly affect state of mind.

I love this brand and this natural wood-looking one is my diffuser of choice.

My favorite oils: 1 // 2 // 3 // 4 // 5

2. Plants and Rocks

A few years ago, “bringing nature in” was not something on my radar nor something I would have considered. Aside from the fact that sometimes I’m not home enough to water them (slash I don’t really want the commitment and responsibility of keeping something alive lol) I’m not really a “plant person.”

But now that I have added plants and rocks into my space…they’re not going anywhere!

There is something almost intangible but innately comforting (and dare I say, natural?) about having a few plants and rocks that you find beautiful to grace your space. (Related: have you tried “forest bathing?”)

As for bits of Earth…geodes and crystals can’t and won’t hurt. Whether or not you believe in the woo-woo properties they can have, you can’t deny they’re the prettiest rocks. Get yours at a local crystal shop (if your town is hippie like that) or online. I prefer to pick them out in person or find them in nature.

These baby palms (pictured above) are my favorite so far. And if that’s too much of a commitment for you, Ikea literally has plants that are cheaper than a single rose (so no reason not to give it a try!) Are the plant and rock skeptics convinced?

3. Himalayan Salt Lamp

The latest piece to join the party, I just recently received a salt lamp as a gift. And though I’ll admit I had my eye on it for a bit before now, again I was skeptical about how much of a difference it would make in my space. (Are you sensing a trend?)

The claims are many — from cleaner air to reducing airborne infection to boosting mood. But for me what it really comes down to is…does its presence make you a little bit happier?

I plugged this puppy in and instantly felt calmer. I love the soft glow it emits. It’s almost like a candle but slightly more soothing. And if it clears the air too? Added bonus.

4. Candles

I never used to be a candle person. Now they’re one of my favorite ways to signal the start of a ritual — it’s time to write, it’s time to relax, it’s time to be thoughtful.

A few of my favorites include Diptyque (splurge – this one is my favorite,) Voluspa or Jo Malone (medium,) and any soy candle that you like the smell of at your local discount store (budget – I have been known to get mine at Home Goods.) World Market also has some great candles centered around cities or countries. There are lots cleverly marketed as the scent of a particular U.S. state. (And you know I had to have that amber candle from Jaipur.)

5. Books (or your equivalent)

Don’t underestimate the beauty and power of having words on pages and titles on the shelf that are meaningful to you.  Delight yourself by surrounding yourself with the small books of poetry or big books of photographs that make you happy just by looking at them (and then, also read them!)

If books aren’t your thing, perhaps it’s music and records, or personal jewelry, or enjoy framed photos. Think of what visually either calms you or brings you joy.

+ All my tiny little good luck charms/good mojo/good memories things.

From my own art to framed words that inspire, to small statues and plush pillows, blankets, and fabrics from my travels…to the Cuban cigar or French wine boxes I use to decorate, or even the box of old love letters and cards from friends that I keep in case of a rainy day. You can’t put a value on the tiny things that bring a sense of love and serenity to your life just by being there.

More Tips for Creating Your Sanctuary Space

• Make an effort to bring in nature.
• Pay attention to (natural) lighting.
• Consider what feeling objects contribute to a sense of restoration, relaxation, and self-care for you.
• Surround yourself with the small things that bring you joy. Clear out the things that do not (the biggest way for you to shift energy in your space is to declutter.)
• Work to engage all of your senses.
• Consider the three ‘c’s: color, calm, clutter.

Your mission, should you choose to accept it: curl up in your hideaway with a good book, a cup of tea (or a glass of wine, who are we kidding.) Surround yourself with some soft fabrics, light a candle, turn on your salt lamp and/or diffuser. Breathe the clean, fresh, and slightly scented air. Turn off the lights. Tune in. Feel the magic of having so many good things that you love all around you. Turn your home into your sanctuary.

*This is my personal version of a sanctuary — insert your own favorite items/home self-care practices as required.

Just like everything else in life…it’s not that we need newer/bigger/better. It’s often simply that we need to take the time to block out the expectations of others and explore what we can create with intention — for ourselves, true to ourselves.

Read more:

// The Art of Hygge, the Magic of Self-Care //

// The Delicate Balance of Home and Travel //SaveSavSaveSave

The post Turn Your Home Into a Sanctuary appeared first on Part-Time Traveler.

(Because the way to the heart is the stomach, clearly.)

What it’s like to return to a place you once disdained, and discover that you quite like it after all.

—

Or, How I Finally Fell in Love with Indianapolis (and a guide for where to eat in Indy so you will, too.)

Two years ago, heck, even two months ago…if you had told me I’d be landing on the tarmac for a work trip to Indianapolis, I’d have laughed in your face and told you you were insane.

It’s nothing against Indiana. Some of the loveliest people I’ve had the pleasure of meeting have their roots in the Midwestern state. It’s just that the job I used to have, the one before all this blogging business, took me there on a semi-regular basis. And when I left said corporate career, just over four years ago, I had zero desire to ever return to the place I most associated with that part of my life. Just like so much of turning away from that path, I was certain I was leaving it in the past.

So as I stared down at the plane ticket bound for IND, I could hardly believe life had taken me back there. Travel writing might just be the most opposite pursuit from pharmaceutical sales. How did pursuing a completely different career take me to the same exact place?

I called my mother. I told her anxiously, “I’m going to teach at Bloghouse again this year.”

“Why don’t you sound excited? That’s always a highlight of your year.”

“I know, but this year it’s in Indianapolis. You know how I feel about the time I spent there. I am uneasy about going back,” I explained.

“It won’t be the same,” she continued. “It may be the same place, but you’ve changed a lot in the five years since you were there. And I’ll bet the city has too.” I shrugged. I wasn’t convinced.

“It’s a challenge,” she claimed. “Time to make new memories there.”

I knew she was right.

So I began to think of how I’d approach my visit to Indy had I been excited to explore a new, fun city, not a place that used to weigh me down with stress, exams, and presentations. How could I see the city through the traveler’s eyes I’d worked so hard to maintain? I sat in contemplation before I asked — what was the way to my heart, despite any other mental blocks?

And then it hit me: food.

Turns out Indianapolis has gone through a bit of a culinary revolution. One of the best restaurants in America? Right there in Indy. Top food city in America? Apparently that is Indy now, too. Conde Nast Traveler went as far as naming it the “most underrated food city in America.”

At the heart of both Indy (well, actually the entire Midwest for me) and of Bloghouse has always been good people. And those can feel hard to find. But as for what would make me fly across the country to spend 48 hours there?

Ladies and gentlemen, the food.

(Disclaimer and note: None of these places were even open the last time I was in Indy! GO INDY.)

Without further adieu, may I present, falling in love with Indy in six simple steps. Here’s where to eat in Indianapolis, now:

downtown indy

Open Society

Why you’ll fall for it: Coffee shop by day, trendy restaurant by night. The only thing more beautiful than its design is its food.
What to order: Any of their salads, duck sliders! Portuguese wine, if your forte.

Napolese

Why you’ll fall for it: In all honesty, the dishes, ingredients, and preparation at Napolese is on a level I didn’t know existed in Indiana. They’re doing great things here.
What to order: Each salad I had was better than the last (which is to say, they’re all good,) and it’s hard to go wrong with wood-fired pizza but my highlights were Elliot’s Pie (pancetta, roasted new potatoes, gorgonzola) and the BLT (Smoking Goose jowl bacon, leeks, Taleggio.)

brunch spread at milktooth – indy’s most buzzed about restaurant

Cafe Patachou

Why you’ll fall for it: A locally loved spot with a comfortable yet upscale feel. On top of their brunch game.
What to order: Any of their “broken yolk” dishes. Don’t miss the cinnamon toast (trust me.)

Milktooth

Why you’ll fall for it: Hyped for a reason, and still lives up to high expectations. You can feel the passion from the chef oozing from the walls of this place. It’s incredible the artistry that is coming out of this cool space and its food.
What to order: Skip the bacon at your own peril. Their coffee drinks are spectacular, but I really fell in love with their matcha beverage. Dutch babies (savory and sweet) are famous – one bite and you’ll see why.

“bacon” at milktooth – obsessed.

Hotel Tango

Why you’ll fall for it: Gorgeous space, a place with heart, Indy’s artisanal distillery. Not to be missed if you’re a cocktail person. Across the street from Bluebeard so a great spot to stop in before dinner there. Also, they have the best bar cat ever (and I’m not even a cat person.)
What to order: They make their own spirits, so choose your favorite and decide if you want to stay with a house classic or roll the dice with one of their seasonal specials.

bluebeard – not just for the kurt vonnegut obsessed. one of the best meals i’ve had in ages.

Bluebeard

Why you’ll fall for it: Honestly, one of the best meals I’ve had in recent months. For me, even topped the illustrious Milktooth.
What to order: Their bread (homemade) and spreads are TO DIE FOR. Truth be told, everything from the menu was divine, and it changes daily, but I still can’t get the grilled octopus or foie gras plates out of my mind. And if there is any sort of peach soup on the menu when you go, don’t miss it.
—

My visit to Indianapolis for Bloghouse was made possible with the support of Visit Indy, JW Marriott, and Visit Indiana though this post is in no way sponsored by these partners.

Shoutout to two classics and blasts from my past…

St. Elmo
(A historic steakhouse and true classic. Get the shrimp cocktail at the very, very least.)

Slippery Noodle Inn
(A fun, local jazz + blues bar with live music every night and that lovable dive bar feel.)
And you’ll also want to explore the very happening Mass Ave, as seen below:

Perhaps you won’t arrive with have the same preconceived notions about Indianapolis as I did. Perhaps you have different ones, or none at all. Suffice it to say that every trip, every place, every journey…has something to offer, lessons to be learned. I didn’t expect to love Indy this time around. But then the best things in life often happen outside of our expectations.
Indianapolis has and is undergoing some major changes, in as little as the past five years. Before I could stop and rebuff that, or interject with doubts, I realized…the same had been true for me.

You may not be able to change a person. But you can change a place. You can fall in love with a place with every bite, against the odds and with any bitter taste left from your last visit. And, the best news of all…you can grow past your past. You can change yourself.

Where to Stay

I loved my stay at the JW Marriott. Rooms are reasonable and the beds were incredibly comfortable.
For something more budget, check out some recommended cheap hotels in Indianapolis.
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The post Full Circle in the Circle City: An Indianapolis Guide appeared first on Part-Time Traveler.

The first response is usually, “that’s a fantastic brand!” or “how’d you get that URL?” followed by,

“What does part-time travel mean?”

It’s a great question and one that I presume everyone has a different answer to. Since I’ve been pondering this since before it was a term, I figured it was time I shared with you how the meaning has changed for me over time.

This blog began the way many blogs are born: I was bored and unfulfilled in my corporate job and seeking a creative outlet, a place to do something I actually loved. Back then, I hesitated to start a travel blog for longer than I’d like to admit. If I had started when I first had the idea, well, I know I’d have been in very little company at that time!

Nevertheless, I waited. I instead sat back and read all the travel writers and bloggers that were posting at the time. When I finally geared up to write my own, I listened to marketing guru friends and enrolled in a simple course. I think it was called, “How To Start A Blog That Matters.” The advice they gave me is some that I still pass on to this day, and that is: think of what isn’t being written that you wish you could read.

For me, what wasn’t on the Internet yet was a travel blog that didn’t want you to pack your bags and hit the road full-time. At that time I had a demanding job, a boyfriend, a lease…I just wanted to travel more than I was currently. I didn’t want to be nomadic for life. No one was writing for me. These nomadic travel bloggers were inspirational, sure, but relatable? Not at that time. And I had a hunch that I wasn’t alone in that.

So came about the concept of part-time travel: maximizing time abroad within limited vacation days. Meaningful travel for young professionals within the confines of their current limitations. The original idea was about things like stretching out business trips, negotiating for more time off, traveling close to home.

Of course, because life is funny sometimes, I then went off and did just the opposite of that. I had done enough thinking, enough daydreaming — a lot of that was around this fantasy that I had to travel for an extended period of time. (Perhaps all those nomadic travel bloggers got to me!) On paper I was living an ideal life, but in truth I was mildly depressed, overweight, in a relationship I wasn’t certain about, and surrounded by people I had absolutely nothing in common with. Naturally, when a friend mentioned during a Skype catchup that she’d be traveling for six months before starting graduate school in the fall, I told her, “I’m coming with you.”

“No you’re not!” she replied. To her, I had already done an above-average job of fitting travel into my life. I’d been to Asia twice that year, including a month of living in India through a company opportunity that I had creatively pursued. The year before that I had taken all of my accrued vacation time and lived in London for a month, traveling around Europe and quenching my travel thirst without losing my high-paying job. Still, at that juncture, I needed more.

I needed an escape.

I don’t recommend travel as an escape. Though when used sparingly, maybe once or twice in your lifetime, long-term travel can be an absolute lifeline, a way to get in touch with who you really are and to open your eyes to what you really want out of life. Plus, it was an opportunity for me to take this new travel blog of mine to another level, right?

Thus, part-time travel became full-time travel (for that year.) And it became very part-time blogging, as I ventured through 18 countries, came home, got my heart broken, picked up the pieces, and started a new life in San Francisco. Suddenly I was in a new life, and part-time travel transformed to take on another meaning yet again.

Part-time travel then became: using the eyes you see the world with when you travel to see your home. It was easy to do, I’ll admit, as I explored my new city of San Francisco. Travel had made what was important to me so much clearer, and it strengthened my resolve to live uncompromisingly in pursuit of it. After a year of traveling the world, I sought out to build a life at home as much as I loved traveling.

For no matter how incredible it is being out in the world, there is so much more I want out of life than can fit in a backpack.

Mostly this boils down to cultivating community and relationships, to the good people that add meaning to my life. One of the best things about traveling is all the amazing people you meet — one of the hardest parts is never getting to see those people after you meet them.

A space to call your own, shelves to hold your books, a box to get your mail, and a closet that you don’t wear on your back…these are all lovely things to have in life, but for me it is the people and the connections that really make a place home. It was a community that I was missing in my old job/city, and eventually what I came to miss most while I was on the road.

So now, part-time travel is a little of all of the above: balancing work and travel, balancing home and travel, living like a local abroad and a traveler at home, and finding your people. Lately, it’s also been the freedom to “try on” other lives, to visit places like London, Paris, and Bangkok every year and pick up where I left off, or to gain a fresh perspective when needed in places like Guatemala, Indonesia, or Greece.

I suppose the beauty of part-time travel, looking back some four years later, is that it is flexible by design. It grows and evolves with you. Part-time travel is not anything I tell you it has to be; it’s without pressure or confines. Part-time travel is simply prioritizing travel more than you are now. It’s not the number of stamps in your passport, or the Instagram likes your travel photos receive. It is a mindset.

Part-time travel is recognizing the transformative power of a journey — even if that journey is intermittent — and committing to making that a regular part of your life. You might even more deeply understand how you define ‘home,’ and how it has shaped you, why it’s significant. The best part about it is how it grows and changes as you do.

What will it be next? Only time, and life, and the beautiful ups and downs of the journey…will tell.

I want you to know at least this: however you fit travel into your life, you can do it in a way that doesn’t mean giving up everything and everyone at home. In fact, I’d argue that it’s even better if you don’t.

Tell me, what does part-time travel mean to you? How do you define it? Though I flatter myself the O.G. part-time traveler (at least on the web,) I am by no means its master. I’d love to hear your thoughts on the concept.

More on part-time travel:

I Could Travel Full-Time. Here’s Why I Don’t.

The post The Evolution of Part-Time Travel appeared first on Part-Time Traveler.

If you’ve found yourself feeling overwhelmed or buried or dredging through your days, look closely at what you’re carrying. What are you allowing to stay in your life just because it’s there?

Whether it’s toxic relationships, bad habits, a noisy social media feed, actual noise, or actual things…find a way to say ‘no’ more often across several parts of your life. We become attached to fixed things that don’t really matter because we often associate part of our identity and security with them (I’m looking at you, third glass of wine, or tweets that demand to be read at 4 am.) It is incredibly freeing to let those things go.
Quite honestly, the best way that I’ve found to clear out your life and your mind and let go is to travel. It’s why so many people travel after a breakup, or when they’re feeling a lack of direction. We also seem to let go of the world’s (or at least our immediate circle’s) expectations or judgments of us when we’re on the road.

[quote] Travel looks  to be externally stimulating, but I’d argue that it’s actually much more of a focus inward. [/quote]
Here are some ideas to produce the same feeling at home. What from your life would you fit into your tiny suitcase?

Decluttering.
Gather all your “stuff.” Clear out what doesn’t just belong in your life’s suitcase. Examine what feels really heavy.
By now we all now about the Japanese notion of decluttering – if it doesn’t spark joy, get rid of it. I like the idea of using your intuition when deciding what to toss. I make two piles (ok, three if I need a ‘maybe’) and I impulsively select either ‘keep’ or ‘toss.’ You can always review the toss pile before you actually throw it out.
One way I’ve routinely gotten better at decluttering something simple like my closet is through an event a friend throws called a ‘Grab and Give.’ Essentially each guest brings in all the items they no longer want, and the rest of the attendees gets to select what suits them. Anything that isn’t claimed is donated to Goodwill. It’s a great way to buy less and to sort through items to donate.
Other things to look for: old papers, old foods, old boyfriends (just kidding.) I also love clearing out old contacts, photos, or files from my phone or computer. You’re literally freeing up space.

Getting quiet(er.)
Turn on ‘airplane’ mode.
Embrace a little more silence and contemplate noise levels of:

• Your mind.
• Your social media feeds.
• Your overall media consumption.

Recommended remedies include: stream-of-consciousness journaling, meditation, your preferred form of exercise and/or a simple aimless walk outside.
As for social media, consider creating lists, filtering your feeds, unfollowing people who do not bring you joy, confining emails/social media/news to only certain periods of the day. Here’s a great short piece on How To Avoid Being Psychologically Destroyed By Your Newsfeed. Also note if you find yourself feeling more comparison than inspiration.
These are small changes that actually make a huge difference in the ability to remain calm and sane.

Sitting with the newfound space.
The other purpose of cleaning and clearing is to create space. What good does that do if you immediately find other people or things to do replace it? Like the person we all know who jumps from relationship to relationship (or the traveler jumping hastily from country to country,) there can be some fear or avoidance around just being. When we allow ourselves to sit for a bit, uncomfortable feelings we’ve been ignoring, a fear of loneliness or lack…these can all begin to creep in. Instead of ignoring them, why don’t we have a listen? (Travelers may recognize this opportunity in long flights or train rides, which are often pensive.) It’s when we clear space — and then have the patience to let it be for a moment — that we allow the right people or things to find room in our lives.

Stepping outside your door.
Similar to any trip, the packed bags or minimalist life are simply a means to an end. What matters is the steps you take once you’ve organized and decluttered. The purpose of packing light is to move more freely. It’s like when in transit you’re able to drop your bags off at a train station locker before heading out to explore a city. You suddenly feel light and free! What actions will you take now that you feel lighter and freer?
The purpose of packing light is to move more freely. It’s like when in transit you’re able to drop your bags off at a train station locker before heading out to explore a city. You suddenly feel light and free! What actions will you take now that you feel lighter and freer?
It is important to get quiet and declutter. It’s even more important to selectively choose what comes next. Once you’ve sat for a bit with the silence or space you’ve created, it’s up to you to mindfully fill some of it with experiences that cannot come from solitude or quiet. Travel forces us to do so; it can be more difficult to seek these fulfilling experiences with the same wonder at home. Still, it’s up to you to seek fresh patterns or behaviors once you’ve taken the time to reflect, or you’ll just end up back where you started.

Being open.
To continue with travel as an example, if you pack your bags and go, step outside your door, and then become too afraid or shy to interact with others around you…there is really no point. We must stay open by engaging with the world, by challenging our sense of security that, while comforting, can lead to staleness. After a rinsing away of the people or things we realize we do not need, or  that bring stress or baggage, it can be easy to close yourself off.  The important thing to remember is that you’ve also become clear on what really matters to you, and you should be able to more easily distinguish whether what you let into your life deserves to take its place.

The point of all of this is to create more space, time, silence. Most people are terrified of one or some combination of the three. As human beings, we tend to resist change and cling to security. We want to know what’s next before we let go of any grasp on what we have in our hands now. So often we are afraid of the in-between.
The space “in-between” is uncomfortable almost every time we allow for it, but I’ve learned…this is where the magic happens. This is where you find yourself. It’s where the good stuff finds you. Whether you’re traveling or not.
Are you willing to create the space to allow that to happen?
I don’t know about you, but I feel lighter already.

The post The Art of Packing Lightly… appeared first on Part-Time Traveler.

If you’re a longtime reader of this blog (thank you!) you may recall that I tend to recap each year utilizing a theme. In the past, there have been reflections through the lens of food and even hotel rooms.

After a year of so many ups and downs for the world, many of us are looking forward to saying goodbye to 2016. Reflecting on the year, I’m looking intently for the good in these past twelve months. Thank you so much for being part of the journey.
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Choosing safe places to travel.

The end of 2015 had me questioning my travel experiences and the world as I knew it. I did not believe one horrible incident abroad would really stop me from traveling, but I knew it would take a few places gentler than Colombia to build my faith back up.

I’m grateful to Ireland, Finland, Estonia, Iceland, lots of travel around the USA, and return visits to my beloved France for doing that for me.

Curating a comfortable home.

Another event that rocked the close of 2015 was unexpectedly having to move out of my apartment in San Francisco due to circumstances outside of my control. As a writer who can work from anywhere, it is a real challenge to make one of the world’s most expensive cities continue to work. This instability surprised me (as it often does) by leading to one of my most content living situations to date. I’m grateful for my current home and for the small touches I’ve been able to add that make it feel like a haven that truly suits me.

Creating annual traditions and daily routines.

From airport rituals to family holiday traditions, this has been a year of establishing and maintaining repetitive manners of being that I truly enjoy. Whether it’s walking down the same street in Paris or working out of the same coffee shop in SF, drinking wine with friends on Wednesdays or lighting a candle to begin my writing process…I’ve increasingly come to rely on and appreciate the simple traditions and routines that keep me grounded.

Chasing passions equally abroad and at home.

Similar to the themes behind these posts, I’ve been able to keep my passionate interests at the forefront of my life by actively seeking themes like cooking classes, used bookstores and libraries, and yoga no matter where I am in the world. I started paying attention to the things that would pique my interest at home or when traveling and then made a point to consistently pursue them. It has woven this interconnected series of experiences and memories for me to draw from all over the globe. It’s one of my ways of designing a life that I love, and I’m happy to continue to have the flexibility to do it.

Cultivating community in San Francisco.

The simple act of introducing good people to other good people has become a great source of joy for me. I believe there are good-hearted people in every place, but there’s something special about the Bay Area to me in this moment. From travel and writing to food and wine (and yes, even politics) it has been wonderful to connect with and support so many people who share my interests and a spirited love of life and people.

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Eating and creating beautiful meals.

My flexible schedule means that I can (sometimes) stop in the middle of my day and cook a meal at home, just because it soothes me. Cooking alone or with friends has become a huge outlet for me. What excites me most, however, is seeking out absurdly delicious meals from all over the world — spicy hand-pulled noodles in New York, red wines with cheese in Bordeaux, roast pork sandwiches in Philadelphia, fresh fish and chips in an Irish fishing village, coffee after a sauna in Finland. I’m grateful to be able to eat in so many places. (It’s a major perk of continuing to lead a travel-focused lifestyle, if you ask me!)

Seeing more of my own country.

I’ve asked this question over and over, but why is that we as travelers often insist on seeing more of foreign countries that we do our own? I have my theories, but I finally put my money where my mouth is this year and traveled to something like eighteen new states this year. My cross-country road trip from Alabama back to San Francisco certainly helped, as did frequent business meetings on the East Coast. More than ever, I’m beginning to understand how different the rest of the United States is from my California bubble. I sometimes feel like I understand less about other states than I do other countries (and this year slapped me across the face with this fact.) I will continue to try to combat this.

Expanding my business.

While I fell short on some of my pitching and publishing goals for this past year, I kept busy expanding my freelance work. Though writing still makes up the majority of my self-fueled profession, I expanded my work in consulting and community management while adding paid photography projects and teaching to my repertoire. As the professional world continues to morph and flex, I look forward to keeping up and to continue growing my business in 2017.

Falling in love with being alone.

I’m an extrovert who thrives off of working in teams, collaborating, and socializing…not ideal for self-employed writer who needs to be alone and in her head to get the majority of work done.

Somehow in 2016, things really shifted for me. I became much more comfortable sitting with my own thoughts and motivating myself on my own. I learned to differentiate between the seeming connections of social media and the real connections that happen in person. Instead of wishing for life to be different, I worked with what is…and I grew to really love it. Though I sometimes wonder how I’d do working in an office surrounded by people, for now I prefer to choose who I interact with and when. I continued to love dining out alone, traveling alone, walking alone…I even began to crave alone time. Something shifted this year, and I feel much more comfortable in my own skin.

Romance in France.

While I paid my love a visit (the city of Paris) and fell in love with a new one (Bordeaux,) for once I’m not referring to my love of a place.

I’ve been in a relationship for most of my major trips, meaning that I hadn’t much experienced the cultural differences of romance as I had other parts of culture. Dating in San Francisco had left much to be desired at times, for me and for so many of my single friends (both female and male.) So it was a lovely, lovely shift in perspective to see how courtship and commitments are approached in countries outside of my own for a change.

Clarity around not just who I am, but what I stand for.

Without going into it further here, many of the world events of this year deeply disappointed me. The ways people treat each other, the things they do or do not stand for, and the values we lay claim to…I have been shocked, I have been wrong (and more than once.) I still believe in the greater decency of humankind, and the many times I disagreed with others proved to strengthen my own resolve. I learned that there are some things we’re going to need to fight for, speak for. Where once I was apathetic or conflict-averse, I found my voice and my conviction in 2016. That is, I suppose, the silver lining for some of the nasty things I’ve seen and heard in 2016.

Finding depth and breadth in friendships.

I wrote earlier last week that I learned this year that investing in true friendships is one of the best things you can do for yourself. I really believe that. Having not been the case during other periods of my life, I’m particularly grateful to have so many friends from so many different parts of my life in San Francisco (and family close by!) at this moment in time. It is, more than anything, what makes having a home and being home here so worth it.

…which brings me to the end of this post, the end of this year.

I’ve spent New Year’s Eve all over the world — in London, in New York, in Sydney. This year, I thought about where I really wanted to be and why…the answer was much simpler than I would’ve anticipated (another theme I’ve uncovered while writing this post.)  I wanted to be home, in San Francisco, creating and enjoying a beautiful meal surrounded by friends. Because no matter where I am or why throughout the year, that is what truly matters to me.

Like so many of us, I struggled, panicked, and drudged through parts of this past year. Yet I see with more clarity than ever what is important to me. And I have 2016 to thank for helping to solidify that.

(Also thanks for the surprise viewings of the Northern Lights in Iceland, the proper pint pouring lesson in Ireland, turning thirty on the beach with best friends, and the return visit to Chateau Balleroy, 2016. That was all pretty awesome of you.)

Happy New Year, and as always, thank you for reading.

xx Cheers!

The post Finding the Good in a Year appeared first on Part-Time Traveler.